why do i feel the way that i do right now?

there are some things i know i can do well, and others that take me a little time. i'm still not totally comfortable calling people on the phone. i still feel a bit out of breath when forced to talk too much. and i know its possible to feel another way. if it weren't, there would be no musicians, politicians, public motivational speakers in the world. there are people out there who can withstand the limelight. they thrive on it. they get their energy from others. i guess those are the extroverts. the introverts feel their energy draining when around too many people, or so that's what i've heard.

there was a delay on the train this morning and everyone was standing around annoyed. but there was a nice suprise. after the first stop, a man got up and offered me his seat. it's nice to see that chivalry is not dead. then another nice suprise when i came into the office. a gift was sitting on my desk with a candy cane attached to it. it was from one of the trainers who works here but whom i've hardly worked with at all. talk about selfless giving. When i walked by i noticed that he also left a small gift for the other administrative assistant here. my gift was a cute card and a very pretty butterfly and dragonfly frame, it's red and silver. i love unexpected surpises like that, espeically when they turn out to be somethng i really like! :)

i left work yesterday in a very bad mood. i guess these small good things happen to show me that it's ok to be positive and not always expect the worst. i was sure yesterday that the world was dark and dour, but i know its just a bad day now and i can let it go. i can try to remember to expect good things, and maybe they will keep coming into my life. i shouldn't be writing this while at work. but i'm bored and there isn't much to do. it's weird to have the flow of words disrupted though by a phone call or an email or someone stopping by. it's too bad i can't be in flow all the time. it's like partaking in bliss..