break from the ordinary

i remember reading on another person's blog an entry about how breaking your routine in small ways can give you a totally new perspective on life, and i think that is really true. she mentioned wearing her hair half up in a new style for a change and feeling like a new person all day, like a princess or something, and washing different parts of her body in the shower and drying off with her towel differently, just to see if it would make a difference, and it did.

i remember when i used to go to meditation group meetings and the teacher would mention that as well. she would ask that we all sit in different seats at the following meeting, or after returning from a trip, we change a particular picture or wall hanging in our living room, just as a reminder that life is fluid, and change is always happening. i have been wanting to break my routine, maybe by going out for walks early in the morning before work, but it is still so cold outside!

i suppose i can walk a different route home, or to and from the train station, but that's such a small thing. i always intend to do things, like organize my closets, make something new for dinner, throw away clutter, invite someone over. but it's difficult sometimes. like last night, all the rain just made me feel sleepy and i went to bed early.

writing things down in my planner helps as a reminder, but for some reason i find it so hard to let go of the old in my life, clear clutter and make space for something new. maybe what i need is fresh energy, new people in my life for new ideas, reinforcing connections. it's amazing how quickly anxiety evaporates when i'm around someone i care about for even a short period of time. they bring me outside myself, and stop my obsessing.

i feel so uncreative lately, can't write anything. i think maybe i should try new modes of self-expression. painting? exercise? cooking? photography? dancing? singing? life is so full of options, of activity, of different people and new things happening all the time. how is it possible that we allow ourselves to get stuck in a rut? it seems completely insane when you think about it.